Eastern View of Failed Events

The philosophies and values of a culture form in part from the shared fears and loves in the culture. Differing fears and loves have contributed specifically to the tendency of Eastern and Western to differ in their perspectives on failed events. Traditional Asian societies placed high value on love within extended families as a response to the fear of starvation. Operationally, families and communities cooperated in agricultural and economic efforts for the good of everyone. This cultural heritage values hard work above most other personal virtues and promotes the view that when one’s efforts fail, the only appropriate response is to persevere and work hard. Harmony and a holistic view of the world guide Eastern thought. In contrast, Western societies whose philosophies and values emerged from the Mediterranean region valued independence and a measure of competition as a result being based in fishing, hunting, herding, and trade. Individuals and their immediate families thrived when they capitalized on their unique strengths rather than when they cooperated as a community. Love and fear were expressed individually rather than communally, and if an individual experienced a failed event, he was responsible to himself when he chose whether to change course or work harder. Analysis and acting on specific parts of the world guide Western thought. If you come from a Western tradition, the idea of a way or path that can guide all of us runs counter to an ingrained individualism. The next section shows how we can integrate the Tao into our personal decision-making and open our worldview to think about failed events in terms of their value to our extended communities and us. Connection of the Tao and Failed Events 4 The Tao is like a well: used but never used up. We can view failed events this way: we can continue to use them, learn from them, ignore them, let them feed us or eat us up, but they will never be entirely used up. The importance of this connection is key in understanding how we can depend on the reoccurring opportunities and easy accessibility of failed events. It may still seem unusual to be speaking of failed events in such endearing terms, in a way that might be difficult to integrate into the vocabulary. However, as the Tao teaches, when we are open to understanding the full realm of paths, many of them paved with bright and shiny failed events, then we can navigate through the gauntlet reaching our own operational success. 11 We shape clay into a pot, but it is the emptiness inside that holds whatever we want.

We shape our failed events, either avoiding them, or embracing them. They are there and will continue to reappear in different forms. A helpful path is to focus on what is inside the failed event – the space between when it occurred and how we responded. This ‘emptiness’ could hold what we are wanting, whether peace, answers, ideas to minimize that failed event in the future, or simply satisfaction of the known. Just as the potter is concerned with the pot, he can be aware of the function, what might be held inside the object he is crafting. If it is a liquid, he will seal the clay; if not, porosity may not be an issue. The intentionality plays the importance of preparing, planning, recognizing and addressing the ‘inside’ of your clay pot. 13 Success is as dangerous as failure. Hope is as hollow as fear. What does it mean that success is a dangerous as failure? Whether you go up the ladder or down it, your position is shaky. This Tao poem presents the dichotomy of success and failure in another viewpoint, as well as connecting it to love (hope) and fear [you can imagine we truly appreciate this chapter]. They say that even a broken clock tells the correct time twice a day, which is an odd way of looking at failure as dangerous or productive as success. If you stand still in life, chances are at some point you will be at the right time and the right place, but only occasionally. Will Rodgers (1879-1935), American humorist, agreed with this perspective, saying, “even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there”. It seems one way off of the ladder is to take risks and make decisions; if these lead to failed events, then we can deal with those events decisively with collective tools, which we have shared. 20 What is the difference between success and failure? Must you value what others value, avoid what others avoid? In such a simplistic statement, it seems that we can view our own lives and decisions a bit clearer. How do we determine what we value? How do we discover who we are? Where our passions lie, and most importantly, how to pursue them aggressively and without compromise? Of course, the authors do not have these answers, as they are highly individualized. However, we are certain that the answers lie in the quest, the quest in the introspect and the introspect requires a confident sense of knowing, embracing and searching for … “the need to fail“.